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New Year, New Outlook

New Year, New Outlook on your wardrobe

By Latest Articles

Do you need a fresh new outlook on your wardrobe??

 

If so please ignore the New Year, New You.

 

You don’t have to reinvent yourself this year to feel good about yourself.

But instead, I would suggest to welcome in and consider the power of upgrading your outlook and approach to how you get dressed.

If your ambition for 2022 is to feel like you are in charge of your future and to shake off the last few years then feel free to use these 5 sayings below to get you out of a style rut.

Switching out the funky, old sayings like ‘I have nothing to wear’ or ‘i’ll loose the weight first’ or ‘my body is the wrong shape’ or ‘I have no where to go’ and re-packaging it to work in your favour is the true meaning of empowerment.

These negative phrases are often not even our own and in fact we’ve inherited them from our mothers and grandmothers.

We also say them so often and off the cuff that we don’t realise how they shape our view of our reflection.

It can be hard work and takes a little time, self-forgiveness and an eagerness to learn however my 5 postitive sayings below are a great place to start.

Take a look and see which one resonates with you. Perhaps you could write it on a post it and put it on your mirror to remind yourself of your new outlook.

Here are 5 positive sayings that you can use when approaching your wardrobe to get you out of a style rut and into your style flow:

 

1. I don’t have to wait to be thinner to feel great

2. How can I have more fun with this?

3. I can be alone and get dressed for me

4. What items have I forgotten I own?

5. What do I need to learn next to build my style confidence?

 

BONUS PRO TIP I use when I’m feeling stuck with what to wear:

Ask yourself ‘Who do I admire, if they approached my wardrobe what would they be pulling out of my wardrobe to wear’.

 

REMEMBER  if you can work with what you’ve got and make the absolute best of it you’ll start to see that successful style is really all about having a positive mindset, taking directed action AND a big dose of  self- compassion (not one of my greatest skills!)

I also think a more empowered outlook is a much needed switch from the last 2 years when our style, our polish and the care in our appearance has been notably downgraded, if not disappeared altogether.

From what I’ve seen over the years from working up close and personal with my clients it the upgrading of our view of ourselves is the secret to having great style.

Wishing you all a more energised, uplifting and postive 2022!

 

You can see the original post of this ‘5 postitive sayings to use’ on my instagram page HERE  and if you would like some practical help with your style then drop me an email at loulou@thestylingstorey.co.uk.

Let’s book in a free call to discuss how I can help you have more fun with getting dressed.

 

The Confidence Gap: A guide to it and how to reduce it.

By Latest Articles

On the BBC site Katty Kay The BBC’s world news anchor shared her views on The Confidence Gap in the lead up to the BBC 100 Women Challenge.

As a Style and Confidence Coach I am naturally intrigued by any study, report or article related to confidence. Our confidence is a valuable resource and is one that we can strengthen and improve everyday. When we are without it, life can feel challenging and restrictive especially in the workplace.

The subject of womens confidence is getting more and more coverage but there is still a long way to go.

I’ve created a guide on the confidence gap, how we can recognise it and most importantly what we can do to eliminate it.

What is the confidence gap?

The relationship between the confidence that men bring to the workplace versus the confidence that women bring. Evidence shows that women are less self-assured than men.
Confidence and competance go hand in hand to be a success but they are not the same thing. women often prioritise competency over confidence at work.
A lack of action, confidence in your own voice and self- doubt that is holding back women in the workplace to succeed as much as their male counterparts.

How do you know if you are suffering from it?

  • Downplaying your achievements by attributing your success to factors outside of yourself; luck, contacts, how you look etc
  • Thinking you don’t know enough, despite depth of experience within your field. Feeling like a fraud, like an imposter, like you’ll get found out.
  • Frequently underestimating your abilities and capabilities and thinking those around you are more qualified for the job.
  • Deferring to the men around you for more than just support but for the answers.
  • Lacking certainty with your thoughts or struggle to put those thoughts into action, you often pull back.

What you can do to reduce the gap

  • Let go of perfection, allow yourself to make mistakes.
  • Work at not clinging to critisism and failure and move on from it.
  • Take action, confidence comes from developing your thoughts and creating action from it.
  • Be honest about your abilities, don’t undervalue them in fact be proud of them.
  • Accept and encourage new challenges, frequently step outside of your comfort zone. Take a risk!
  • Don’t take the blame if it wasn’t your fault.
  • Be conscious of your body language, posture and eye contact, keep it positive, strong and open.

To summarise in Katty Kay’s words ‘The confidence gap is due to a noxious stew of perfectionism, risk aversion, fear of failure and over thinking’.

The good news is we are not alone and there is something we can do about it as Zachary Estes, a research psychologist illustrates: ‘the natural result of low confidence is inaction. When women don’t act, when we hesitate because we aren’t sure, we hold ourselves back. But when we do act, even if it’s because we’re forced to, we perform just as well as men do’.

This is not a time for complacency, this is a time for action, for asserting ourselves in an elegant yet powerful way. I ask you, who’s with me?

Join the tribe over on Instagram here to give you a daily boost of confidence: https://www.instagram.com/thestylingstorey/

Original article here

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/../../loulou-storey/the-confidence-gap-a-guid_b_18171592.html

 

6 ways to rediscover your identity

By Home Page, Latest Articles, Personal Style, Style Tips

Credited Hattie Stewart

Have you lost your sense of identity? Do you know how to find it?

It’s amazing what we put up with. Day after day living a life that only just will do and feeling disconnected from our identity. I see it over and over again, incredible women who allow themselves a second rate life, allow themselves to sit in the shadows and hide away in clothes that are ill fitting, worn out and confirm their feelings of unworthiness.

Recently I was working with a truly beautiful and inspiring women who i’d been coaching for the last few months. She’d come to me at her lowest ebb but she’d been open to finding a new path.

There we were on the Kings Road in Peter Jones, a couple of hours into her session. She was trying on clothes she never thought she could pull off or have the confidence to wear, when she suddenly turned to me and said with a touch of sadness & regret; ‘i’ve just realised I’ve been hiding in the shadows for 20 years’. We paused for a moment both of us with a lump in our throats and as that sunk in her look changed to one of determination and she said ‘no more’.  With that the style lesson stepped up a notch and we really got to work on carving out the confident identity she had been desiring for so long.

It really is possible to see yourself in a new light, one you never thought possible. It may feel overwhelming but it actually just starts with a few small steps:

1. RECOGNISE & ACKNOWLEDGE

Coming out of the shadows begins with an initial moment of recognition that you are not where you want to be. It has to start there, with honesty & vulnerability.

2. INVITE CHANGE

So often we replay the same day over and over but is it actually working for you? Welcome in a new way of living and get some momentum going by starting with a small switch. Put some earrings back into an old piercing, wear an alternative pair of shoes to your normal choice, spritz a different perfume.

3. HAVE AN OOPS MOMENT

An oops is better than a what if. Give it a try and don’t beat yourself up about it. Reconnecting with what makes us feel good means that we have to make some mistakes. It’s not how often you get it right, its how open you are to self discovery.

4. POWER DRESSING

This is not 80’s corporate suiting i’m talking about. Power dressing is the items in your wardrobe that really shape your identity. Put another way they’re the clothes you own that make you want to puff out your chest, hold your head higher and shout ‘this is me’. Connect with them and then ask yourself why? Why do these do this for me and then seek out more of that!

5. PLAY DRESS UP 

Time to have fun with your dressing and pull out pieces that you’ve not worn in a while, match new  colours together, borrow your sisters dress and outfit with your wardrobe. Whatever it is to get your creative juices flowing and champion the power of  ‘I wonder if this might work together’.

6. GO BACK TO SCHOOL

Until you understand yourself & discover more about you, your clothing is redundant. Functional at best. Knowledge is the key. Take on learning about style with an open and forgiving heart. Remove the need to just ‘buy more’ or ‘buy new’ but start learning what suits your figure and your colourings by becoming more aware of when you get compliments or when you feel that power in your clothes.

Mindful dressing is the key and connecting with our own truth is at the centre of that.

If now is the time for self discovery and you are ready to enter down that path, a life out of the shadows with a confident sense of your true identity is a lot easier and a far more fulfilling way to live.

For daily #louloustylelessons come join me on Instagram or drop me an email if you are ready to discover how powerful rediscovering your identity can be.

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